Florida, The Popsicle State.

So, I spent 8 days on the beach, and let me tell a you a few things about Florida USA. As you may know, "o'clock" is short for "of the clock", well, in 1926, John Ringling of circus fame, a major player in the Florida scene, had had enough of this. John felt that "of the clock" was grammatically "unamerican", he preferred "by the clock". So in Florida, everyone says "b'clock". For example: "happy hour starts at 6 b'clock" or "when the man came into my room at 5 b'clock to give me my pills, I could tell by the way his hands smelled that he had been handling limes".

Also, beer hats. Beer in Florida tastes much better with a hat on. So I bought a hat. Hat is pictured above.

While in Florida, I read a book called "Carbs, who needs them, you do."

Pat Conroy is the new mayor of Florida.

Another thing I learned in Florida is that Star Wars fans are idiots, and that being the third worst movie ever made does not make Revenge of the Sith worth seeing.

And last night, I got up from the couch while watching the Tonys. I kicked my 80% full bottle of Mexican Beer across the floor. The bottle slid across the room, bounced off the far wall, and did not spill a drop. When I returned from the kitchen, my girlfriend's uncle won the Tony, and she burst into tears.